


Please, Just Stop Trying to Help

by AGL03



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Hiatus fic, Humor, Radcliffe is just trying to help, Tumblr Prompt, fitzsimmons can't catch a break, special guest appearance by doug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-25
Updated: 2016-05-25
Packaged: 2018-06-10 16:13:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6963814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AGL03/pseuds/AGL03
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tumblr Prompt: Could you write a fic where Radcliffe goes into creeper shipper mode after the main finale event but before the time jump?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Please, Just Stop Trying to Help

**Author's Note:**

  * For [agentcalliope](https://archiveofourown.org/users/agentcalliope/gifts), [overworkedunderwhelmed](https://archiveofourown.org/users/overworkedunderwhelmed/gifts).



Doctor Holden Radcliffe felt as if he were a school boy once again. A nervous excitement fluttering in his stomach akin to how he felt his first days of school. After all today was very much like that as it had been ages since he has been able to work and collaborate with anyone near either of their caliber. A few weeks after the defeat of Hive Radcliffe found himself back at the Playground to consult with Agents Fitz and Simmons once again. He had offered, numerous times, to have the pair come to his labs, their Director having none of that. It was as if he didn’t trust him with the pair. Radcliffe peered in his bag again to make sure he had his tablets, one with his Hive research and the other a few of his designs he hoped to get Fitz’s input on.

The hanger had been repaired and all signs of the battle that raged gone. Director Coulson waiting for him on the other side of the steel doors.

“Doctor,” He greeted in a tone that could barely be considered tolerant.

Radcliffe ignored the man’s distain, Coulson could never understand what Radcliffe was doing. “Director,” he greeted back eyes locked on Coulson’s hand. Once again marveling at just how lifelike it had become. Fitz had seemed to even add fine hairs to in since the last time he’d seen it. 

Coulson sensed his stare and held it up for Radcliffe to get a better look. He grabbed it eagerly looking it over in the better light. “I rarely get jealous Director, but this has me green with envy. Truly remarkable.”

“Fitz has certainly outdone himself with this model,” Coulson agreed as they approached the lab. “But Doctor, you are not here for your enjoyment. This is not a play date. Fitz and Simmons had enough on their plates before they had to help you clean up your mess. You will be respectful of their and my time while you are here, understood?”

Radcliffe smiled with a slight bow, turning on the charm. “Of coarse Director. I am acutely aware something like this is a complete waste of their time and talents.” 

Coulson fixed him with a glare as they arrived at the door of the lab. It was nearly empty, most of the tech already gone for the day. Fitz and Simmons at their station, the site taking Radcliffe’s breath away. He watched transfixed as they worked silently, never looking up but passing tools, chemicals, and tablets effortlessly between one another. For Holden it was as beautiful as watching the Russian Ballet. 

“Fitzsimmons,” Coulson called and their heads snapped up in unison, professional and polite smiles crossing their features. 

“Fitzsimmons?” Radcliffe asked in a whisper.

The Director did smile at that, “They’ve been a team since the Academy, each incredible in their own right…but put them together and they are a scientific force to be reckoned with. Take my hand for example,” holding up the prosthetic “Fitz made the early versions while Jemma was….away….it was a marvel and got the job done. But when they were reunited and he was able to devote his full attention to it, we get this, and he only continues to make it better.” 

Radcliffe felt his stomach flutter in excitement again as the Director continued “Its my understanding one of their professors gave them that name after particularly impressive demonstration of their team work. From then on they were a unit and have a connection to each other I had thought didn’t exist anymore”. 

Radcliffe nodded grateful for the new bit of information. He had gone digging about the pair immediately upon his return his own lab, finding that all trace of the pair physically and professionally had disappeared a few years ago during Shield’s fall. 

The pair approached offering their hands. “Doctor Radcliffe, its good to see you again,” Jemma started and Fitz picked up without missing a beat, “If you will come with us we have laid out what we have discovered since we last met”.

Radcliffe followed like a happy puppy wondering just how long he could drag this out.

******

Radcliffe had been on the base for a few days and he’s started to sense that there was more to the Fitzsimmons relationship than merely a professional collaboration. 

He’d first noticed lingering touches and extended eye contact while working side by side with them for hours on end. Those tiny actions often followed by an excited giggle from one of the lab techs. 

It was late by the time they got done that day and Radcliffe had gone to the kitchen for a cup of tea before returning to his room for the night. He approached the dimmed kitchen and slowed hearing two familiar accents already there. Hope bubbled he could possibly start a conversation with them over his latest eye tech, but the sight of them caused him to freeze in place. 

He was clearly about to interrupt a moment, Fitz having backed Jemma against the counter, his hands on her waist, hers on his neck, their heads ever so slowly inching towards each other. 

Radcliffe couldn’t explain why he was so excited to see this and held his breath in anticipation. There lips centimeters apart when the other door to the kitchen crashed opened and they leaped apart. Mack coming in and grabbing a beer out of the fridge before engaging them in light conversation. The hulk of a man hadn’t noticed but Radcliffe’s superior eyes did. The glimmer of disappointment that flashed across both of their features as they pulled apart. 

********

After that night Radcliffe became acutely aware that there was a physical relationship between the two. Even more so, how frustrating it seemed to be for the pair…..and himself. Despite spending nearly every waking moment together they hardly seemed to be able to spend time together. It was as if the other Shield agents made goal of interrupting them. 

Radcliffe would always check before entering a room they could be cuddled in. And every time he hung back to just watch them, someone else felt the need to trapse through with no regard to the kids or their privacy. 

It was time for Radcliffe to take matters into his own hands. He had a vested interest in them being as happy as possible…aside from the fact the pair were completely adorable. Coulson’s words sticking with him, but put them together and they are a scientific force to be reckoned with.

And put them together he would….

*******

Fitz entered the supply closet, biting his tongue as he came down to get yet another chemical Radcliffe had forgotten to ask Jemma to get while she was in there. 

“I”m coming!” Jemma called testily just finishing locking the cabinet that secured the truly nasty chemicals. She turned and saw Fitz, her expression softening in an instant. 

“He forgot to ask for something else, so I’m going to need back in there.” He said gesturing to the locked door. Jemma groaned, Doctor Radcliffe making a serious dent in their supply of rare and expensive components. 

She turned to reopen it, handing Fitz what she’d already pulled. “How much longer is this visit supposed to be?” she asked.

“A week at most,” Fitz assured more than ready for him to be gone. He was more than uncomfortable with how Radcliffe looked at them and the constant hints of what a fantastic team they would all make. Or the improvements he would love to see Fitz make to his own tech. “If we don’t find a cure by then, he goes back to his lab and we work independently for a bit.” 

“Well I don’t know about you, but I am more motivated then ever to figure this out and get him out of here. He reminds me of Garrett the way he looks at you sometimes,” Jemma said with a shutter pulling out the bottle. 

Cabinet secure once more Fitz went to open the door finding the door wouldn’t open….again. “Oh bloody hell!” he cursed trying to force the door open with his shoulder to no avail. 

“Again?” Jemma said exasperated. 

*********

Radcliffe watched the hallway carefully looking for any sign of an agent that would come and mess with his plan. Some well placed caution tape rerouting the traffic for a few minutes at least. 

“Its as if the entire base lives to keep them apart right,” An agent said casually leaning against the wall at the end o the hall. Radcliffe turned puzzled, first panicking that he’d been caught before realizing he seemed more amused than upset. He had seen him around the base but had no idea of his name. 

“Call me Doug,” the agent says with a small smile. Then gesturing to the supply closet with large cart overloaded cart parked in front of the door. "We tried that once….and they used the chemicals inside to melt the hinges and move the door out of the way…yeap there they go.” Doug said with a smile as smoke began to come from the hinges. Seconds later triggering the fire alarm. In only a matter of minutes a small army of agents would arrive and Radcliffe decided that now was the best time to be heading back to the lab. 

He turned to say something to Doug, ask if he had any more insight, only to find the agent had also made himself scarce. 

**********

Radcliffe’s next plan didn’t fare much better, in fact it completely blew up in his and practically everyone on the bases face….well stomach’s. He figured that the pair would appreciate an uninterrupted evening, one where everyone on the base took the night off, and had a nice nap in the process.

He’d overheard the pair talking between testing samples that afternoon. Fitz excitedly whispering that he’d gotten clearance from the Director for the two of them to leave the base, producing two tickets to a Planetarium with flourish of his hands. 

Radcliffe himself was delighted by the beaming smile that came from Jemma, and in a rare show of public affection she hugged Fitz with a squeal. Fitz blushed furiously, caressing her cheek tenderly before they pulled themselves together and set to work. 

“Fitzsimmons,” He said trying to ignore the slightly dark look that passed their faces as they turned to him. “I”m going to run and talk to your Director for a moment, just need to discuss a few logistics, I’ll be back shortly.” 

They nodded curtly and went back to work. Radcliffe slipping away trying to ignore Agent Mackenzie’s rumbling laugh “Careful man, you do not want to get on their bad side….trust me”. 

Radcliffe made it to the Director’s office and was once again met with a cold glare. This one from Agent May and he was sure given the right enhancements to her body she would be able to kill a man with a single glance. 

Coulson was at his desk, mountains of paper work littering his desk and every other surface of the office as he prepped for the looming hearings they would all be facing. “What can I do for you Doctor?” he asked curtly “I’m assuming there hasn’t been a breakthrough otherwise hurricane Fitzsimmons would be behind you talking too fast and in a language I to this day can’t decipher.” 

“No, I’m afraid we haven’t. But we are getting closer every day. They are indeed quite brilliant when they are working together,” Radcliffe said. “The virus isn’t why I’m here though.”

Coulson finally looked up with a raised eyebrow and Radcliffe continued. “I understand it was my virus that infected a large number of your agents, friends of the people that have to put up with me every day. I was wondering if I could offer a gesture of good will, buy everyone a pint?”

“I can hardly let you run down to the local liquor store,” Coulson said stopping as Radcliffe held up his hands.

“Then if you order it from a source you trust, I’ll pay, how is that?”

Coulson considered him for a moment before nodding, everyone on the base could use a bit of a pick me up. “Fine, I’ll call Tom and he’ll send some kegs down. You set them up in the common room and I’ll even let you make the announcement”. 

So that was how, hours later, that Radcliffe found himself setting up the impromptu bar, discreetly slipping is own little concoction into the spouts. It wasn’t harmful, rather supposed to be a mild sedative, ensuring the base would be quiet when the scientists returned a few hours from now.

That had been the plan anyway and something Radcliffe had learned in his limited interactions with the spy agency, that their plans rarely worked out as intended. 

******

Jemma let out a contented sigh as the approached garage door leading into the base. Her hand was holding onto Fitz’s on the center console, as he used the other hand to drive. 

In her lap was a bouquet of flowers Fitz had purchased for her from a small cart they’d found walking from dinner to the Planetarium along with a stuffed bear dressed as Leo the Lion he’d presented her with as they’d walked to the car. She had fawned over it for a moment in the gift shop, but hadn’t allowed herself to get it, feeling it would be too childish of a purchase. 

Fitz pulled into the designated spot and just turned for a moment to look at her adoringly. “I had a wonderful night,” he said his accent deep and causing her heart to skip a beat. 

Jemma smiled leaning towards him, still holding his hand and using the other to thread through his hair and pull his lips to her. “And its not over yet,” she said seductively after a heated kiss. “Take me home and lets see if we can make each other see a few stars of our own.” 

Fitz sucked in a breath, still trying to get used to just how forward Jemma was in this department. And at this very moment was not going to question it. He quickly exited the car and ever the gentleman ran around to her side and opened the door. 

She took his offered elbow with a giggle and they headed into the main part of the base. And the second they cleared the threshold they knew something was amiss. 

The smell of sick hitting them first, Fitz turning green at that alone. May appearing around the corner looking sweaty and pale. Her hand was on her stomach and she wore a determined look on her face. “We have a situation,” she panted taking a moment to swallow deeply. Fitz felt his own stomach ready to revolt knowing very well what she had just done.

“What on earth?” Jemma asked following May, both she and Fitz offering a helping hand that she waved away. The sounds of retching now hitting their ears. 

“We think its food poisoning,” May said pausing again to take a steadying breath physically willing herself not to get sick. The Calvary did not throw up in the middle of the hall and she most certainly didn’t do it in front of others. “We are testing everything we had for dinner…but in the meantime your help would be appreciated.” 

They arrived in the lab and every seat and surface had an agent sitting at it holding a bag, bowl, beaker, anything they could get their hands on. 

Jemma allowed herself a moment to stare at the room mouth agape before she steeled her resolve, placing her gifts on the highest most out of the way shelf she could find, before turning to her clearly traumatized boyfriend. 

Gently she took his face in her hands, not in the way she’d been intending too when they’d left the car, and forced him to look in her eyes. I need you to start administering anti nausea drugs while I start treating for dehydration. If possible get a list of what they’ve consumed in the last 12 hours.” He nodded trying to block out the sounds and smells around him. This was definitely not how he saw his night ending.

In the corner Radcliffe sat, curled feebly around his own bucket as his stomach revolted as well. Karma, he thought bitterly as he realized what ingredient he had gotten wrong. This was definitely not how he saw Fitzsimmons night ending, vowing he would one day make it up to them. 

********

It had taken a few days for the base to return to normal and even longer to get the smell out. Radcliffe was running out of time, his stint nearly over, and he had yet to find the time to work with Fitzsimmons on his own work…or make up for ruining what he had heard through the grapevine had been a lovely evening. 

He sat in his chair in the lab, impatiently waiting for the latest round of results to come in. He was just about to ask Fitz if he’d had any new modifications for Coulson’s hand in mind when something on the shelf above them caught his eye. The glass container full of what seemed to be black rocks. 

“I have stood on alien soil and took a portal to get there….” echoed in Radcliffe’s head and his curiosity got the better of him. “So is that some of the alien soil you were telling me about?”   
To his horror he watched the smiles slip from their faces and their eyes travel to the jar. Jemma leaned in closer to Fitz and his arm wrapped around her shoulder. “Its what is left of the portal that got us there,” he said darkly.

Radcliffe should have known better, read the signals, and just shut up but he couldn’t help himself “Us? You both were on an alien planet?”

“I was for six months,” Jemma said softly now fully leaning into Fitz’s embrace “It was Hell….Fitz, he risked everything to save me.”

“And I’d do it again,” he whispered.

“Did you see any tech, meet inhabitants, could their biology in any way help-” Radcliffe started his questions now coming in a rush.

Fitz cut him off with a glare and a raised hand “Where do you think Hive came from?” He snapped leading Jemma out the door without so much as a another look at the Doctor. 

Radcliffe sank back into his seat, his brilliant mind putting the pieces together. Her time on the planet must have been the separation Coulson had alluded too. And that poor girl had lived around Hive for six months, when he himself could barely stand the week or so he’d been his captive. 

“They’ve been through enough without you opening your big mouth and reminding them of it,” a familiar voice chastised coming from the door. 

Radcliffe looked up to see Daisy standing there. He hadn’t seen her since arriving at the base, the young Inhuman looking worn. Her eyes red rimmed and her skin pale. He understood that her withdrawal had been brutal and was compounded by the loss of her lover.

“I didn’t know and I wont’ again,” He said honestly. Had he he would have never brought it up. 

“You had better not,” Daisy said sitting at the terminal next to him. “Because if you do I will open a hole in the earth and swallow you whole…no one will ever be able to find you.” 

He nodded dumbly knowing very well what she was capable of, seeing her in action more than once. Daisy continued, pulling up a video on the computer. “I had always hoped I’d find a guy like Fitz one day, one that would look at me the way he looked at Jemma.” She paused pointing at the screen indicating for him to watch. 

What he saw made his heart skip a beat at the raw emotions on display before him. Fitz screaming, crying, and beating at the solid rock to “Do something”.

“You have no idea what they have overcome to get here,” She said. “He gave her his last breath, she drug him up from the bottom of the ocean, he lost his mind, she went away to Hydra to allow him to get it back, he scoured the earth for six months after we’d all given up, diving into the unknown, and pulled her back from that Hell. She endured hours of torture at Guyiera and Ward’s hands to keep him safe and he agreed to go back to Hell to stop them from hurting her.” 

“I didn’t know,” Radcliffe repeated.

“Now you do,” Daisy said rising and leaving the lab, stopping in the door one last time. “They are my friends, my family, I couldn’t be happier for them right now and wont’ tolerate anyone messing it up. And just an FYI, May knows it was you who caused the puke-apocolypse last week, I’d watch my back if I were you.” 

Radcliffe scrubbed his hands over his face letting it sink in. They were merely kids and had been through so much. And damn it, they deserved to be happy. 

The computer at Jemma’s station beeped, indicating the results were done. Wearily he went to click on them and pulling up on of her minimized the window instead. 

It was a personal email that he minimized immediately, seeing just enough to give him one last idea. 

Dear Jemma Simmons,

This email is to confirm the cancellation of your reservation at the Four Seasons Seychelles…

**********

There was a class at the Academy every student was required to take as they neared graduation and going into the field. It had an official name, but the cadets all called it Kidnapping 101. As Kidnapping and/or being taken hostage was a real risk for any of them. Be it their knowledge, expertise, or simply being a convenient human shield when a Shield facility was stormed.   
They covered how to act, what to do, and tips for getting out alive. Mostly along the lines of keep your mouth shut until the Specialists arrived and beat up the bad guys. 

And in his time with Shield Leopold Fitz had found himself both kidnapped and used as a human shield more times than he ever dreamed he would. 

However, this time, was a marked improvement from the last time. This time he didn’t wake up with his arms bound behind his back laying on the cold steel floor of a Hydra jet. This time he awoke laying on a plush bed, covered in white linens, gossamer curtains draped elegantly around the dark four posters of the bed. Jemma was curled up on his chest, still fast asleep from whatever had been used to drug them. 

The last thing he remembered was heading in a caravan to the first of the ATCU hearings, Fitz having to speak to the modifications Hive had made to the warhead while Jemma the nature of the virus and the devastating effects it would have had. Once minute they had been discussing adding bio sensors to Coulson’s hand the next curled up in the softest bed he had ever been in.

“Jemma,” He said rubbing her back gently as he sat up, getting a groan in response.

“Fitz,” she whined cracking her eyes open and taking the room in with a gasp. “Where are we?”

“No bloody idea,” He said looking out the window and see crystal blue waters. “But I can safely say no where near the Playground”. 

“Your are correct Leopold,” a female voice said starting them both, Fitz pulling Jemma behind him best he could. “Please do not be afraid, you and Jemma are here as our guests. My name is Aida and I will assist you during your stay.”

“We’ve heard that before,” Fitz snapped.

“And we won’t do whatever it is you want us to do,” Jemma followed a beat later. “Take us back to Shield, now.” 

Aida was quick to respond. “You will be returned to Shield seven days from now when the next flight is scheduled to arrive at the island. In the meantime Doctor Radcliffe has provided clothing, food, activities, and reading materials. He wishes for you to have some uninterrupted time together.”

“We wish to go home, we can’t just leave-” Fitz protested.

“Director Coulson has agreed to it as well,” Aida added calmly. “Are you hungry staff is ready to-”

“Wait?” Fitz said

What?” Jemma demanded “The Director agreed to this?”

“Would you like to speak to Director Coulson?” Aida asked.

“Yes!” they nearly shouted in unison and withing moments Coulson’s face appeared on the screen. Their leader looking an odd mix of amused and upset.

“Sir-” they started and he held up his hand to silence them. 

“I understand this is all a bit confusing-” he started.

“We’ve been bloody kidnapped to a tropical island, even for us this is a bit odd,” Jemma shot “and she is saying you authorized this! If you had wanted us to go I would have kept our trip to the Seychelles!”

Coulson rubbed his temples, “Long story short Doctor Radcliffe has whisked you away to a privately held island. He refuses to divulge the location and it will take us longer than a week to track you down-”

“Then lock him in a room with May until he talks!” Fitz said “Man has no spine, she’d break him in a matter of seconds.” 

“May is there with you,” Coulson said. The pair only looked at him in stunned silence. “She agreed that you two deserved and needed some time away. She is on the island with you as insurance and protection. But you wont’ see her unless something goes wrong, until the plane arrives to pick you up.”

Coulson offered a genuine smile, “So Agents Fitz and Simmons, you can either spend the week building a raft out of your bed and a radio out of some coconuts. Or you can put your toes in the sand and enjoy each others company.” With that the screen went dark and the pair simply looked at each other dumbfounded for a few moments before smiles finally spread across their faces.

“Aida?” Fitz called.

“Yes, Leopold”

Fitz frowned at the use of his full first name but let it go. “Can you ask the staff to have dinner prepared at seven and until then, place our room on do not disturb…including yourself.” 

“Of coarse Leopold, I will alert you when its ready,” Aida said the room falling silent. 

Jemma crawled across the bed to him her smile turning mischievous as she settled into his lap. “So Doctor Fitz,” she purred nipping at his neck “Whatever shall we do, captured, and imprisoned in this horrible place.”

Fitz couldn’t stop the groan that escaped his chest, “Well Doctor Simmons, I for one have counted 389 interrupted romantic moments since we started officially dating. And I intend to make up for every single one of them,” he said his accent thick and sending chills up her spine before she captured his lips with her own. 

“I counted 394,” she said between kisses. 

Fitz pulling away to stroke her cheek “Even though I am better with math, I am willing to accept your number and strongly suggest we get a few more in the bank for after we return.” 

Jemma giggled, wanting to give witty comeback of her own, instead pulling his face her hers as he gently laid her onto the bed.

End

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End file.
